Winter Blues (or— my least favorite jazz song)
Lana Del Rey’s 2012 hit (yes, I’m throwing it way back) Summertime Sadness is echoing through my head as I write this. Outside the weather is dreary and there’s a gale force wind advisory. In the PNW, the turn from summer to fall and winter hits like a ton of bricks. I’m sure the change is more gradual than it seems, but it feels like all of a sudden one day I wake up and the grey sky and rain are smothering me.
For some, it’s an invitation to get cozy and a reminder that like nature, they are allowed to slow down and rest. For many people, it’s a abrupt shift and can lead to feelings of anxiety and seasonal depression. Every year I feel a little like I’m being dragged kicking and screaming from summer to fall. The sun is so precious in Seattle because it seems like it disappears for five to six months with the occasional surprise hello, so when it begins to hide behind the expansive grey, I can feel my body protesting the change. I’ve tried many things to ease the transition; buying cozy flannel shirts or sweatpants to wear, listening to an autumn inspired playlist, turning on my Himalayan salt lamp (don’t judge, it’s a part of many therapists’ self care tool boxes) when it gets dark earlier, but sometimes I can’t shake the dread.
I’m reminded of an old grad professor who would probably tell me that the turning of summer to autumn and winter is also an invitation to grieve. The shorter days and loss of light can drive us straight into the reminder of what we might be processing in our own lives. It’s much easier to push that aside when the sun is out.
When we encounter the deepening shadows at 3pm, I wonder how that could move us towards remembering the losses we feel deeply in our lives and offering ourselves comfort. Acknowledging, rather than tuning out. And this year, at the very least it might be invitation to remember and have some compassion for our bodies, which had to hold a lot of anxiety last year due to the pandemic and the changing of the seasons and the fear of what the winter might hold for us.
As always, be in touch with your mental health professional and physician and ask about what support might look like during the darker months of the year. Some other helpful tips on how to handle seasonal mood up’s and down’s can be found: here.